MINDSALAD

200811. ADHD, impatience, or just the norm?

I’m not sure if it’s just me, but nowadays, when I surf the web, I’m quite certain I have the attention span a 6 year old child.

Page doesn’t load in under 10 seconds? Definitely clicking the “X”.

Download stalling and progress is slowing? I cancel it and reload it. 

Watching streamed TV online or taking notes in class? I likely have several windows up and am chatting with people and checking for freebies simultaneously. 

Have I become so batshit that I feel the need to make every second of my day more efficient? Sadly, yes, yes I think so.

Below is a sample of what my screen normally looks like, minus the fact that I’m not a brown and I’m not a man. haha.

190811. moola moola.

I was at Aritzia yesterday, musing at this beautiful, sheer short-sleeved blouse, a perfect addition to my work wanna-be-professional clothing collection. But much to my dismay, reality slapped me in the face as I turned over the price tag, $85+tax. Pretty much $100. But it was just a blouse. Seriously, did I miss something? Apparently, money grows on trees nowadays.

As I came back down to earth, I turned, and at the corner of my eye, caught a glimpse of a 12 year-old, at the fitting room, trying on that very same glorious piece of clothing. You could see it in her eyes, that beam of confidence, the glimmer of pride. Her, also 12 year-old, friend whispered something in her ear and they giggled as they continued to admire themselves in the glowing mirror, flipping their blonde hair in the non-existent wind. I imagined them in their little pubescent bodies saying something like, “Ohhh, you want this Michelle? Well, you can’t have it. My new iPhone app tells me its the new hot trend. And mommy tells me I haven’t maxed out my credit cards this month yet.”

Well, no. No I can’t afford it. haha. As much as I’m like, “Whoopty-doo, finally made it to med school after these bajillion years”, I’m pretty much on welfare. The reality of things is, I will have no inflow of cash until at least residency 4 years from now. And even then, that income will not be substantial. The illusionary abundance of money that people perceive physicians to have, doesn’t come until about a decade after the beginning of school. So for now, yes, I have a huge line of credit available to me. But it’s one that I must pay interest immediately on. AKA, it’s just a massive pile of potential debt. Me right now? Zero money.

It’s kind of funny. My family jokes about how by the time I get out, I should buy them cars, etc. And I would gladly do so. I owe them that much after all the things they’ve done for me. But when you think about the fact that my parents will be in their 70s and my siblings will be in their late 30s when I get out of med school, you realize they likely would have everything they need by then. Married, established home-owners, with kids, 2 dogs and the whole white-picket fence already. Then finally, when I am sufficiently sleep-deprived, malnourished, and physically aged with crowsfeet and a slightly balding patch of hair, I will be rolling in the cash. Yay! Forever dependent.

190811. mi casa.

Man, what a nice change of scenery from my place in Windsor. It has been so nice moving into the heart of downtown Toronto. Yesterday, I literally left my condo, walked to the Eaton Centre, returned an item at Aritzia and Banana Republic, shopped around a little, and managed to get home, all in under half an hour. Every dinner date or drink night this week? Less than a 10 minute walk. Haha.

But it’s so much more than that. It’s the liveliness of Yonge-Dundas Square, the lights and nightscape of skyscrapers from my living room, the accessibility of pretty much everything you need, right at your very fingertips.

The only downside? My credit cards have been getting the biggest beat-down of their lives. With daily visits to the mall, I have spent more in these last 3 days than I typically do in a month. Meh. :)

P.s. Yes, 90% of the things in my condo are from Ikea. Bahaha.

180811. TIL, part 2.

One more random fact of the day. Pineapples grow like this. Haha. Who knew?

180811. TIL.

This is where cashews come from? No wonder these suckers are so expensive. But FYI, if you ever travel to India and find these, don’t eat them at this stage. Apparently they’re poisonous. 

150811. the end of an era.

Dear Windsor,

Thanks for giving me the opportunity to explore. To grow. To fully understand what it means to be carefree. To drink.

Can’t say I’m not ecstatic to leave. Because I am. I’m glad that I have officially completed my MBA. I’m beyond excited to begin medical school next week.

But you have taught me so much about what it means to be independent. To be faced with new challenges and know that no matter what, I will be able to overcome them.

I grew up shy. And although I thought outgrew those roots over the years, you have taught me what it means to be able to be truly convivial. You have provided me with the confidence to walk up to anyone from any walk of life and believe I have the capacity to socialize about anything. Because of you, I am now able to get up in front of a stage, no matter how large, and have absolutely no fear about delivering a presentation, even if I don’t know anything about the topic.

You have taught me how to carry myself in a manner that people will take me professionally. To walk the walk and talk the talk.

For everything that this year was, I am grateful.

Thank you.

140811. ten random tips for life.

1) For tough-to-open jars, run it under hot water for 10 seconds. Or wrap the top of the lid with a thick elastic band, it somehow gives it leverage.

2) When streaming TV shows online with limited viewing time (e.g. videobb or Megavideo via www.sidereel.com or www.fastpasstv.ms), open the video, let the entire thing load, then turn off your Internet connection. This will avoid them from tracking the duration in which you have been watching.

3) Always wash your dishes right after each use. Washing one dish is easy, washing a pile seems like a chore.

4) For hard-to-scrub dishes, soak it first in warm water for 10-15 minutes, you’ll find everything will come right off.

5) Dryer sheets are miracle workers. If you have stinky shoes/snowboarding boots, throw two sheets in each. Or if you’re too lazy to wash your entire duvet or comforter, throw it in the dryer with two sheets, it will come out smelling fresh.

6) If you hate/fail at ironing, buy a steamer. You literally finish any shirt or pant within 1 minute.

7) When meeting people for the first time, repeat their names after they say it. It will help you remember it.

8) Ladies, for those mornings when you’re in a rush and don’t have time to shower, dry shampoo is your best friend. For ~$2.99 a bottle, there’s one by Tresemme from Shoppers Drug Mart that your bangs will be forever appreciative of.

9) If you’re trying to lose weight, be sure to cut out pop/juice/milk/energy drinks/coffee/alcohol, etc. They’re empty calories in liquid form. You can easily lose 5 lbs a year by just opting for water in your diet.  Also, if you drink a cup of water before a meal and stop eating when you feel 80% full, it will help you avoid overeating and you will feel 100% full about 10 minutes later. It’s just your stomach sends delayed satiation signals to your brain.

10) Hangovers are a result of dehydration. If you eat a full meal and down a WHOLE bottle of water at the end of a wild night, I can assure you that you’ll wake up feeling glorious and functional enough that you can even study.

130811. a real love/hate relationship.

Hate is a strong word. I know that. And as much as I love her, some days I hate her. I hate the fact that she looks down on people who aren’t as fortunate as her. I hate the fact that she feels entitled to everything my dad has ever worked for. I hate the fact that no matter what I do, she always thinks she knows better.

No, it isn’t unreasonable that there is beginning to be more female doctors than male.

No, just because someone is adopted, doesn’t mean they’re a bad person.

No, pushing my nose upwards in my spare time will not shape it permanently sharper.

No, Tiger Wood’s wife did not sabotage his career.

No, she shouldn’t have stayed with him even if he cheated on her with 10 different girls.

No, I don’t care that you don’t approve of my decision to buy a used rather than new bed frame.

No, I won’t change my mind, even if it’s the 7th time you’ve asked.

No, it is not “stupid” that I want to grow out my hair and donate it to cancer patients again.

No, I didn’t my “brains” from you. I got them from Dad.

No, I don’t think it’s okay that you threaten to leave to wherever you want in the world, every time you and Dad get in a fight. 

Dad worked 12 hours a day, 7 days a week up until about 10 years ago. And even after he pays for 4-5 overseas vacations every single year, you have the audacity to tell him that he doesn’t provide you with enough?

Yes, I appreciate everything you’ve done for me growing up. But at times, you embarrass me. Your lack of education and real-world experience bothers me. Your stubbornness frustrates me. But worst of all, your arrogance and conceit is what is most bothersome. I’m sorry, but you’re a housewife.  A silly desperate housewife that sits around gossiping with her friends, bragging about their kids. And that’s fine, but don’t you dare judge and ridicule me for the choices I make in my life.

I love you. I appreciate you. But I am no longer a kid, and do not deserve to be treated like one.

040811. overrated.

After hearing rave reviews from friends, I had been dying to go to Brassaii for a while. “It was the new ‘it-spot’ in Toronto”, said J. Since Mister and I were going to watch Blue Man Group for our delayed 3-year celebration anyhow, fine dining felt fitting.

Sadly like many other high-end restaurants, Brassaii fell short. I mean, the place was beautiful. Really chic atmosphere, had some cool rustic vibes. The type of place corporate hipsters go to.

But as a foodie, who spends 90% of her monthly credit card bills on things that my body digests and poops right back out, I was slightly disappointed. That lamb below? $34, before appetizer, drinks, tax and tip. And our $15 appetizer? I guess we failed to notice the lack of pluralization in “seared scallop”. That’s right, no “s”.

I’m not sure if it’s just me, but I don’t feel this incessant need to be “cool” anymore. Is it wrong that some days I prefer pulling on a pair of jeans and going for my $8.29 quarter chicken dinner at Swiss Chalet? haha. I’m pretty sure things will change again someday, but until then:

bar > club

comfort food > fine dining